This Is More Than Love
by ShadowBeats22107
Summary: Clint ran. What Loki wanted him to do to Natasha plagued his mind every moment of the day. And night. So he did the only solution he could think of; he ran away, something he had perfected from his childhood. Now, seven months later, Natasha's found him. And she wants her best friend/ partner/ lover back where he belongs; with her. Rated M or a very good reason. Clintasha.


**Fanfic:****This Is More Than Love, Avengers****  
****Author:****ShadowBeats22107****  
****Disclaimer:****I do not own Avengers, only the DVD. I don't own **_**JLS' 'Close To You**_**.' I do own the plot of this story though.  
****Rated:****M or NC/17.****  
****Word Count: ****5,034.****  
****Summary:****Clint ran. What Loki wanted him to do to Natasha plagued his mind every moment of the day. And night. So he did the only solution he could think of; he ran away, something he had perfected from his childhood. Now, seven months later, Natasha's found him. And she wants her best friend/ partner/ lover back where he belongs; with her. Rated M or a very good reason. BlackHawk/ Clintasha.**

**Author's Note: This is part of my series, 'Where We Belong'. So let me know what you think. Sorry for any typos or OCCs. And the song that helped inspire this is at the bottom but if ye want to hear it, YouTube works better than CDs at times ****.**

* * *

Clint looked out the window of his London apartment onto the snow covered city as he sipped from the seventh (or was it his eighth?) bottle of beer he'd had so far. He was an absolute wreck. If only _she _was here. Then he'd, at least try, to get his game back on. But he couldn't risk it. If that son of a bitch Demigod, Loki, ever regained control over him and hurt her, he'd never forgive himself. He wouldn't – no, couldn't – let that happen.

"Seven months, four days, twenty two hours, seventeen minutes, forty five seconds and counting," he whispered to himself as he took another sip from his bottle, noting how long it had been since he had last seen, last held, last kissed his fiery red haired Russian partner and lover.

_***** Flashback *****_

**Clint looked down at Natasha, who was sleeping soundlessly on his bed in the apartment Stark had given him for the week. He had given the red haired beauty one too but Natasha chose to stay with Clint. Which surprised the archer; even after all that had happened and she still wanted to be around him **_(no pun intended guys, this is serious stuff)_.** But Clint knew (felt) he had to go. To protect her. He looked down at the letter he'd written to her, explaining his decision:**

'_**Dear Natasha,**_

_**By the time you read this I'll be gone. So Baby, I want to apologise; you don't deserve this, me running away. So for that I am truly sorry.**_

_**I need to get away. Well, for now anyways. I'm scared I might hurt you. So I ran. I don't know when I'll be back. But when I do, you'll be the first to know.**_

_**I also want to thank you. For so much. But I don't have enough time to write them. The main one is: thank you. For showing me how to love again. For showing me how to trust again. You always say that I showed you how to love and trust again. But Baby you showed me that too.**_

_**I know that you probably hate me right now. I really hope that, one day, you'll be able to forgive me. I love you, so much. Please never forget or ever doubt that. I'll miss you.. Natasha. My heart. My life. My love)**_

_**Forever yours,  
Love,**_

_**Clint.'**_

**He placed the letter beside her head as he got up. He paused before leaning down and kissing her softly, then whispered, "I love you Natasha," against her lips. He left quickly, a bag of clothes, a picture of him and Natasha and his car keys. He'd left his dog tags with Natasha, knowing how she preferred to have them when he was sent on solo missions. Once he got to the garage, he quickly got into his car and drove. Where was he going? No clue. How long? As long as it took to make sure Loki could never used him to hurt Natasha. That's all that mattered.**

_***** Flashback *****_

Clint sighed as he remembered the red haired beauty. Her soft, pale skin. Her gentle touch (it always amazed him that such a dangerous and deadly woman could be so gentle and soft). Her emerald green eyes. Oh God he missed her so much.

"Didn't I tell you before that I hate when you drink by yourself?" a rough yet soft voice asked suddenly, making Clint jump up and face the intruder. He knew that voice well; it was the same one that had been haunting him the past seven months.

"Natasha?" he whispered as the said woman stepped out of the shadows in the apartment. His breathing stopped as he noticed what she was wearing; a pair of his old tracksuit bottoms, his dark purple hoodie and a pair of trainers he'd bought her a few years ago. And dog tags. His dog tags. Her hair was longer than what it had been the last time he had seen her, which didn't surprise him. Her face was free of any make-up. But there were dark bags under her eyes, suggesting she hadn't slept in a while. She looked like a wreck. Well, for her standards. "Is this a dream? Or is it another nightmare?" he whispered as she walked over to him, standing directly in front of him.

"I hope it's neither of them," she replied as she raised her hand to trace his features gently. "When was the last time you shaved?" she whispered as her fingers ran over his stubble.

"Nearly a month ago," he murmured as she traced his lips, watching her every movement.

"I read your letter," she stated as she finally met his eyes, emerald green locking on stormy grey. "I still don't understand why you left," she confessed before she stepped closer to him.

"Nat... I had to protect you," he whispered, turning his head to look out into the night sky. "I can't lose you."

"Then why did you leave?" she asked, hurt evident in her voice. He closed his eyes and turned from her fully, walking over to the kitchen that was joined with the living room. "The last seven months, I've felt like I'd lost my best friend in the battle of New York... And now that you're standing in front of me, it's as if that feeling couldn't be more true... IT'S LIKE YOU DON'T EVEN CARE ABOUT ME – ABOUT US – ANYMORE!" she shouted at him, making Clint turn around at her tone and volume. But most of all, at her accusation.

Clint swallowed before replying. She had every right to be pissed off at him. To hate him. "Seven months, four days, twenty two hours, nineteen minutes and thirty eight seconds," he stated, making her pause in confusion. "That's the length of time since I last saw you. The amount of time I have spent wishing - hoping, praying - that I was in a nightmare and that when I woke up, you'd be safe in my arms. And the whole Loki incident never happened. Ever since I left, I've been hoping and praying that you'd be safe while I was gone," he confessed.

"Then why did you leave?" Natasha asked again. "I'd just got you back from Loki's mind control. And you just left. Why?" she whispered, tears forming at the corners of her eyes.

"Because I'm afraid that Loki will regain control over me. And then use me to hurt you," Clint eventually whispered, his voice hoarse with emotion as he remembered what Loki had wanted him to do the love of his life. "I can't let that happen."

Natasha walked over to Clint and took his face in her hands. "You won't. You didn't," she whispered before brushing her lips over his lovingly. "I want my best friend, partner and boyfriend back Clint," she murmured against his lips. "I want you home."

Clint could only nod in response before eventually whispering, "You can have whatever you want Baby." Her only response was claiming his lips hungrily, almost desperately. He ran his hands down her sides lovingly before letting her jump up slightly so she could wrap her legs around his waist.

"Can I ask you when the last time you had sex was?" Natasha whispered teasingly against his lips as she wrapped her arms around his neck and grinded against his hips, smiling as he moaned as she brushed her core against his erection.

"Seven months, four days, twenty three hours, six minutes and forty seven seconds," he replied as he leant her against the wall so he could hold her more properly.

"The last time we made love," she stated, smiling softly at the knowledge he hadn't, eh, _moved on_. Clint only nodded and kissed her more thoroughly, smiling as she moaned as he licked her lips tauntingly.

"Did you..." he started but let the question hang. But Natasha knew exactly what he meant. She pulled away from their heated make out, both of them panting from the lack of oxygen.

"Do dreams about you count?" she whispered as she leant her forehead against his. "'Cause that's the only action I've gotten during the past few months," she confessed before claiming his lips hungrily.

Clint smiled into their kiss and could have sighed in relief, had his lover's tongue not been half way down his throat. "I love you," he murmured in between kisses. He broke the kiss and began to trail biting kisses down her neck, licking and sucking, leaving several marks on her, more than often, pale skin.

"I... l- ... love... you... too," Natasha managed to moan as Clint teased her sweet spot. "Fuck... Clint..." she gasped as he moved one hand under the layer of clothing she'd on and cupped her right breast.

"What is it Tasha?" he whispered, as he sucked on her left collarbone. "Tell me what you want."

Natasha threw her head back in pleasure before biting her lip in slight pain as her head hit the wall. "Oh God... You... Clint," she groaned in pleasure and pain.

Clint pulled away from her shoulder and raised an eyebrow in concern. "Are you okay?" he whispered, noting she had a slight look of discomfort.

"I will be once you go back to what you were doing," she murmured, grabbing his head and placing it on her neck. "I think you were right here," she muttered before gasping in pleasure as Clint bit down on her skin, just this side of pain, leaving, yet another, mark there. Not that she was complaining.

Clint smiled against her skin before grabbing her ass and carrying her over to the couch. "How many rounds do you think you'll be able to manage?" Clint teased as he laid her down on the cushions. He mouthed at the skin not covered by the fabric of the hoodie.

"More than you anyways," she shot back, moving her hands to the rim of his tank top. "How are you not cold?" she whispered; it had been snowing for almost two weeks and yet here he was, going around in a simple, black tank top and sweat pants as if it was the middle of summer.

"Really? Are we getting cocky Ms. Romanoff? And as for your question; I thought you were the Russian one," he murmured as he broke away from her skin to let her pull his top off. "I'm sure I can think of a few ways to warm you up," he added as he pulled the zipper of her hoodie down, kissing the path as he did so.

"Just because I'm Russian doesn't mean I like being cold Clint," she murmured as she sat up and let him take his hoodie, her t-shirt and vest off of her. "And I'm only stating a fact... I have much more stamina than you Clint," she added, grasping the nape of her partner's neck.

"That wasn't what you said in Tel Aviv... Or were we in Beirut?" he murmured as he began to unclasp her bra. Once the troublesome piece of clothing was off, he latched his mouth to her left nipple, sucking hungrily on the rapidly hardening nub.

"I think you mean Istanbul," she gasped as he bit down on her nub pleasantly. "The time... w- when you woke me... up during the night for food... And we ended up fucking for hours?" she asked in between gasps and moans as he used his hand to play with her left tit before switching his lips to her left while he used his other hand to caress her right breast.

"Now I don't think it's my fault that you can't seem to take your hands off me?" he teased, blowing on her skin, making her squirm and arch her body towards his touch. "And if I my memory serves me correct; you have told me on several occasions that you love that I wear you out all the time."

Instead of answering him (and the fact that she wanted that multi-talented mouth of his to its much better use), she pulled his head down in between the valley of her breasts. She moaned in pleasure as he bit on the soft skin there. It had been far too long since they last done this; not even her dreams had done her lover any justice.

"Fuck… Oh God," she gasped as Clint began to move further down her body. Once he reached the waist band of her bottom, he quickly removed both the tracksuit bottoms and her panties. She grasped her head, massaging the spots on the nape of his neck, making him moan against the skin of her stomach, showing that he wasn't in as much control over his lust as he seemed.

"Someone's getting impatient?" she teased before gasping suddenly and arching her back so far off the couch, it looked like she would break her spine. "Fuck… Clint," she groaned as he slid two of his fingers inside her soaked entrance.

"You were saying?" Clint muttered against her love mound, blowing teasingly on her clit which made her buck her hips up into his face. "You love this," he teased. "You love it when I go down on you. Don't you Baby?"

Natasha could only nod. The pleasure of what Clint was doing to her was making her brain short circuit. And he was only using two of his fingers. Suddenly he curled his fingers inside her, making her scream in ecstasy, her hands gripping his hair for purchase.

"I want an answer Baby," he growled before taking her clit in his mouth, sucking greedily on the nub. "You're so wet Nat. You really love it when my face is buried in between your thighs. Don't you?" he whispered as he added another digit inside her.

"Y- Yes… Oh God… yes," she moaned, her head thrown back in pleasure as her partner continued to pleasure her love box.

"Thought so," Clint murmured cheekily before adding a fourth finger inside her and sucked hungrily on her clit.

Natasha screamed in pleasure and arched her body high off the couch, her legs wrapping around Clint's head as she came hard on his face and fingers (more like his hand than just his fingers). Once she calmed down from her high and relaxed her grip on his head and hair, he released his lips from her clit and slowly pulled his fingers from her juice covered pussy.

Clint began to kiss his way back up her body when he paused as he noticed a scar on her stomach. It was a relatively new one, maybe a month or two old. But what stopped his movements was that the scar looked deep. "Tasha?" he whispered, looking up at her with concern in his eyes.

"I'm fine Clint," she whispered, caressing his left cheek softly. "Avenger mission didn't go to plan. I got shrapnel lodged in my stomach," she answered his unspoken question.

"Nat I'm sorry. I should have been there. I should have been there, watching your back," he whispered as he sat up properly, his head in his hands. His body shook slightly as he tried to control the tears of sorrow, tears of self disappointment, his self hatred, his frustration.

"Clint," Natasha whispered as she knelt, laying her hands on his shoulders, massaging the tense area lovingly. "I want you Clint," Natasha whispered into his ear as she slid her hands over his shoulders, down his chest so she was hugging him from behind. "I need you Baby," she murmured as she kissed and sucked on his one of his weak spots behind his left ear lobe. "I forgave you a long time ago Clint. Now it's time for you to do the same," she whispered into his ear.

Clint could only nod as he turned his head to hers, letting her catch his lips tenderly. Eventually he turned to face her, kneeling slightly on the couch, his hands on her hips. Clint moaned as she grinded against him. "Come on Clint," she taunted as she sucked on his lower lip. "You have way too many clothes on," she stated as she grinded harder against him.

His only response was smirking gently against her lips before pushing her down onto the couch and then climbed on top of her. He broke the kiss so he could ask her a very important question. "Do you want to take this to the bedroom?" he whispered as she used her feet to remove his pants and boxers, making him groan as his erection was finally freed.

Natasha pretended to think about it before smirking. "I think the bed can be another round," she suggested/ stated as she gripped his member in her small pale hand, pumping him softly.

Clint groaned as he rested his head in the crook of Natasha's neck. "And... where do you... plan on... us taking this... to?" he murmured in gasps and moans as she pumped him harder.

"I can think of several places that we can... 'Christen,'" she muttered seductively, grinning smugly as he moaned loudly against her skin as she used her free hand to massage his balls. Suddenly, she flipped them so she was on top. She, slowly, slid her body down his until she was faced with his length. She gave it a slow lick, from base to tip, grinning as he grabbed the couch and threw his head back in pleasure.

"Fuck... Nat," he moaned as she took him into her mouth. He could feel her smirk as she bobbed her head in a differencing pace as she used one hand to pump what she couldn't fit in her mouth while she used the other one to play with his balls.

"What is it Baby?" she whispered as she released her hold (her mouth hold) on him, placing soft kisses on his erection as she slowly began to move back up his body. The main word was _slowly._

"Have I... told you... that you... are a tease?" he whispered as he flipped them over so he was on top again.

Natasha pretended to be offended before she responded, "Yeah... Budapest, Tel Aviv, Beirut, Istanbul, Berlin, Rome, Dublin, London, Paris, Tokyo," she stated smugly. "And that's the first ten that came straight to mind but I'm too impatient to list the next sixty-seven times," she added as she gripped him and positioned him at her entrance. He smiled as he answered her unspoken question and slid into her.

They both groaned as he filled her to completion. It had been far too long since they were this close (dreams don't count), so he had to wait for her to stretch to accommodate him. "God... Nat," he moaned as he leant his forehead against hers. "Jesus Nat, you're so fucking tight," he groaned as he felt her flutter around him.

"You... are to never... leave me... again," Natasha ordered as she wrapped her legs tighter around his waist while she wrapped her arms around his neck. "You can move now," she whispered as he kissed her gently.

Clint nodded before beginning to move gently inside her, pulling out until only the head of his length was inside her then thrusted back into her. "I promise... I'll never... leave you," Clint whispered against her lips. "This is... where we belong," he whispered as he traced his left hand over where her heart lay. "Together," he murmured as he laid one hand on the cushion beneath her head.

"Together," she repeated as he thrusted deep inside her, each thrust hitting all the right spots inside her. She threw back her head in pleasure, her nails digging in deep into her lover's neck as he drove her deeper into the cushions of the couch. "Oh God... Yes... Clint," she moaned as she tightened her legs further around his waist. They were both close – that she knew – especially with how Clint's thrusts had become very erratic and their breathing more laboured. "Shit... Clint... I'm close," she whispered before she cried out in pleasure as he hit a certain spot inside her, arching her body up into his.

"CLINT!" Natasha screamed in pleasure as she came around him, her walls clenching firmly around him, pulling him into his climax with her.

"NATASHA!" Clint grunted into her left shoulder, where he had left several large love bites on her neck and shoulder as he came hard inside her, his seed covering every possible inch of her walls and womb. He collapsed slightly on top of her, most of his weight on his forearms to make sure he didn't crush her with his weight while he rested his face in the crook of her neck as he recovered his energy as she did the same.

"I love you Clint," she whispered against his right temple before kissing his temple gently. She massaged the nape of his skin softly as they regained their breath. She smiled lovingly against his temple as he lifted her up and walked into the bedroom.

"I love you too Nat," he whispered as he laid her down on the bed, gently pulling out of her. He laid soft butterfly kisses over her body. When he laid one on her stomach, Natasha made her decision.

"If I said I wanted to leave S.H.E.I.L.D., what would you say?" she asked as he lay down beside her, letting her cuddle into his side, resting her head in the crook of his neck.

"I'll follow you anywhere Nat... But do you really want to leave S.H.E.I.L.D.? Are you willing to do nothing for the rest of your life?" he replied as he stroked her back lovingly with one hand while he used the other to stroke her hair.

Natasha smiled against his skin. "That's why I'm asking you," she said softly as she leant up on her elbow to look at him. "Fury told me last week that if you or myself wished to leave S.H.E.I.L.D. we could. We'd still be members of the Avengers but we would no longer be requested to do S.H.E.I.L.D. missions," she confessed, smiling at the look on Clint's face.

"Really?" he whispered, his eyes locked on hers. When she nodded, he claimed her lips lovingly with his own. "Then if you want to leave S.H.E.I.L.D. we will," he told her as he slowly rolled back on top of her, their lips brushing against each other.

"Do you... want... kids?" Natasha asked suddenly in between kisses, making Clint pause in surprise.

"What?" he whispered, making sure he hadn't misheard her. Yes he was deaf but did she just ask him if he wanted kids? Where was this going?

"Do you want kids?" she repeated as she locked her green eyes with his grey ones.

"With you; yeah," he confessed as he brushed a few stray strands of her red hair out of her face. "But do you want kids Nat?" he asked, keeping his eyes on hers, looking for any sign of doubt or hesitation. He found none as she answered him.

"With you; yes," she replied, repeating his words, smiling slightly at the look on her lover's face. "I was thinking of the idea of having kids before and during your mission in New Mexico. Forgot about the idea during the Tasseract incident but the past seven months let me have time to think about it again," she explained. "But tonight I've realised that I definitely want kids with you," she confessed.

"How many?" he asked as he took her hand and kissed her fingers lovingly.

"Three," she whispered eventually. "Two boys and a girl," she whispered, kissing him softly. She smiled softly as she felt him smile into their kiss.

"Marry me," he whispered into her mouth as she opened it to let his tongue invade her mouth. His statement made it Natasha's turn to pause in surprise.

"Marry you?" she repeated as he sucked on her weak spot. "Clint?" she moaned as he bit down before licking the spot.

"Natasha Alianova Romanoff will you marry me?" Clint asked as he knelt up and pulled a box out of his bedside locker.

Natasha raised an eyebrow in confusion but gasped in surprise as he opened the small velvet box to reveal a beautiful silver-banded ring with a diamonded sided on both sides with two emeralds.

"I bought this two months before I went on the mission to New Mexico," Clint whispered as he handed her the box. "Will you marry me?" he repeated nervously.

"Yes," Natasha eventually whispered when she found her voice again. "Yes I'll marry you."

Clint smiled and collided his lips against hers as he slipped the ring onto her finger. Their lips moulded against each other as he pushed her gently back down into the bed. "Thank you," he whispered in Russian as she opened her mouth to allow him entrance.

Natasha could only smile before moaning in pleasure as he trailed his calloused hands over her breasts and stomach before trailing his left hand down to her entrance and circling her clit. In response, she gripped his member and pumped him firmly.

"They say practice makes perfect," she murmured as they broke apart to breathe, flipping them over so she was on top. "What do you think Baby?" she teased as she slid the tip of his length through her folds, teasing him for an answer.

"You did say something about christening the apartment as well," he gasped before sitting up and taking her right nipple in his mouth, an attempt to coax her into taking his dick inside her wet cunt.

Natasha gasped in pleasure as her... fiancé played with her breasts, using both his mouth and fingers. "Fuck... Clint," she moaned. "Fuck... Clint... Oh God... Just... Fuck..."

Clint smiled then groaned in pleasure as Natasha lost her own patience and pushed him back inside her. Their lips met sloppily as she moved slowly on top of him. She wrapped her arms around his neck as they kept their slow rhythm while he wrapped his around her waist.

"Should I... be considering changing... my name... to 'God'... Tasha?" he teased playfully as their powerful thrusts sent him deeper inside her.

"Definitely not... I prefer... Clint..." she replied, arching her body into his as she neared the edge. "Fuck... Clint, I'm close," she whispered, leaning her forehead against his, their lips continuously brushing against each other.

Clint nodded softly, feeling her walls tighten around him. "Come on Nat," he whispered her lips, "Cum for me."

With that, Natasha came, pulling Clint into his orgasm with her, both grunting each other's name in mutual pleasure and contentment (physical, emotional and mental contentment).

Natasha collapsed on top of Clint as he lay back down onto the bed, his arms wrapped protectively and possessively around her waist. "Love you Clint," she whispered sleepily against the crook of his neck, one of her hands resting on his chest while she used her left hand to grab one of his and interlaced their fingers.

"Love you too Nat," he whispered, raising her hand to his lips, kissing her engagement ring lovingly. "Reunion sex and Engagement sex in the one night. As well as a retirement from S.H.E.I.L.D. plan and plans for kids. How many records have we broken tonight?" he whispered into her hair, smiling as he felt and heard her chuckle sleepily. He pulled the covers over them as she answered.

"More than I want to count at the moment," she whispered before yawning.

"Go on and sleep Nat. I'm tired too," he whispered, kissing her temple lovingly. They were both exhausted, not only from tonight but from the last nineteen months too (the missions in Russia and New Mexico and then Clint leaving).

"Okay," she mumbled childishly as she nuzzled her face further into the crook of his neck. "Goodnight Baby. I love you," she whispered as she let sleep take over her system.

"Sleep tight Nat. I love you too," he whispered as he, too, let sleep override his mind; the first time he willingly let sleep take over his mind in almost two years.

* * *

_London, Paris, Tokyo  
Thinkin' of you wherever I go  
When I close my eyes  
You're by my side  
A thousand miles can't keep us apart  
Your tender words serenade my heart  
And you keep me smiling,  
Perfect timing._

_I wish you were here with me tonight_

_See I've travelled around the world now  
And I've seen so many beautiful girls now  
But somehow, no one ever comes close to you  
You know I've been so many places  
And I've seen so many pretty faces  
But Baby, no one ever comes close to you  
Close to you  
Close to you_

_Planes and trains through sudden rain.  
Another hotel, another day breaks.  
And I'm on my way,  
I called to say_

_I wish that you were here with me tonight_

_See I've travelled around the world now  
And I've seen so many beautiful girls now  
But somehow, no one ever comes close to you  
You know I've been so many places  
And I've seen so many pretty faces  
But Baby, no one ever comes close to you  
Close to you  
Close to you_

_And it feels like  
You are always with me  
On these long nights  
Another lonely city  
You are right here, right now  
Cause in my mind I never left at all  
Never left at all_

_See I've travelled around the world now  
And I've seen so many beautiful girls now  
But somehow, no one ever comes close to you  
You know I've been so many places  
And I've seen so many pretty faces  
But Baby, no one ever comes close to you_

_See I've travelled around the world now  
And I've seen so many beautiful girls now  
But somehow, no one ever comes close to you  
You know I've been so many places  
And I've seen so many pretty faces  
But Baby, no one ever comes close to you  
Close to you  
Close to you_

_Can you hear me?  
Can you hear me?_

_Close to you  
Close to you_

* * *

**Whoa ho. Finally finished this. Buíochas le Dia (Thank God). I love it when I finish a chapter. And the lyrics to the song just suit the plot to this part. Well, in my opinion.**

**So do you want me to continue this? Or is it worth any reviews? Your choice.**


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